A dark night with stars

 I think we all change a bit all the time, not just in new year ,but it feels extra strong at this time, right? Ah, I mean the celtic new year, that I've been celebrating for years now, as part of my pagan tradition, which is quite random and eclectic.  So, I found amazing things yesterday at this store with mom, matcha latte ready to drink, vegan of course, cocoa latte, a soap with affirmations made of natural, real cinammon and stuff, tasty , nice looking lipsticks, etc. I've never wore anything similar to red lipstick...I was excited ,I was scared as well, I thought...I thought I'd look like a caricature of a woman, even if I myself am a woman and had always identified as one. I can pinpoint it to the age when I was like getting into the "gay" world, with friends, most were men and most of those men dressed up as girls, they looked quite good, but I feel somehow they looked down on lesbians, cos they kinda felt that the stereotype of a lesbian not wearing makeu...

 No, this isn't gonna be a deep view of the hermetic principles of the Kybalion. This is just about how our bodies really mirror our emotions and the people around us, and even those who leave, also do this. Why? You may ask, it's simple, I was under an ungoddessly amount of stress 2 weeks ago, I was doing this job that I did not want to complete. I applied to it without asking the nature of the subject, alas it was 2 videos, one about papers and Covid and one about water treatment... Both were boring and tedious but the water treatment one, the transcript wasn't so good, one of the people didn't speak clearly etc. So, my inner voice kept saying "quit, apologize, send it back", because I have this rule of thumb, if some work I get is too complicated, I don't feel confident or I am considering to just perish while doing it, I will quit, apologize and be done with it. But I let a sense of guilt and shame overcome me. I managed to finish it on time, I had dia...

  So many words and we are just getting started. Well, I was looking online, because where else? About how to connect more with the femenine energy, how to get in touch with this side that many of us have forgotten, pursuing the "I can do it all on my own!" energy. I understand where this comes from, as many of us surely do, my mom was a single mom, be strong, don't rely on others, that is what we hear, and while it is awesome to do your own things and don't sit around and wait, there's more to it. I myself have learnt how harmful and exhausting it can be to, well exist, and even more so if you have something really big and you try and tackle it on your own. Sure, some things only you can deal with, and in the end, everything comes down to you internalizing these processses. But let's see, one day I was walking with an ex, another woman mind you, we went to buy water (here you gotta buy water, usually in 20 lts. containers) and I was carrying it, cos you know,...

  Hace ya un tiempo que quería dejar de usar Whatsapp. Ese sentido constante de hiper-conectividad y disposición 24/7, siempre me resultó algo inquietante. Finalmente, debido a una semana particularmente alocada y pesada en mi vida, me retiré a recargarme, lo que suele significar no hablar con nadie un rato y no usar Facebook, pero esta vez, lo llevé un paso más adelante, la mensajería instantánea existe, es conveniente y todo mundo la usa... ¿Entonces, sería demasiado raro no usarla? Hasta cierto punto, pero no pude haber imaginado la infinita alegría que me produce el no tener el ícono verde y blanco, ni azul, pues tampoco pienso instalar Telegram.  No tener instagram o twitter de uso personal (los tengo por trabajo pero nunca los uso) es una cosa, pero dejar de usar algo que me parece el 100% de las personas que conozco, usa...eso sí que es atrevido, es ir contra corriente y es justo lo que necesitaba, no sé si lo volveré a utilizar, lo que sé es que existen los mensajes de...

 I am understanding that I enjoy duality, the human "realm" and the spiritual, light and dark, in every possible shape or form. I have looked into some apparent contradicting positions in life, and I have been able to understand both sides, because each side has a point that makes sense, at least to some extent. Anyway, I took a very interesting workshop about the menstrual cycle and how the preconceived ideas we women grow up with, well everyone in general, but for example, I had my first period at 9 years old, I perceived it to be treated as a dirty secret, I really disliked it and the pain that came with it, as if it was a curse. Turns out the pain, the cramps, are not normal, not to be expected, that is a disorder and it was sad to see we've grown accustomed to feel them and endure our "terrible faith". So I am writing small notes on how I feel on an app for menstrual period, because in the long run, or after 3 months at least, it will give me an idea of how...